I guess one of the main reasons that my posts are mixed up is that my mind has been preoccupied since late Saturday night. Mathias called. It was inevitable; the handwriting had been on the wall for weeks; the odds certainly suggested this outcome. Mathias and Sasha have broken up.
I had been among their strongest supporters. I do believe in first loves. How could I not? I met Steve at age eighteen. He is my one and only true love. Actually, my family's history is full of youthful relationships lasting the couple's lifetime. It was easy to be optimistic. Afterall, there were plenty of forces to pull them apart. They didn't need me to jump on that bandwagon.
Still, Steve and I cautioned Mathias and tried to prepare him. It was never really going to work, sad as that is. Steve and I just waited. We didn't interfere. Thus, we were here for his telephone call, to be listening, sympathetic ears. Mathias is hurt and sad.
I've been told that being the mother of a girl is much, much more difficult than being the mother of a son. I don't agree. I've asked several wiser people, parents of both sexes, for their opinions. Most say it depends on the child. Right now, I don't think it EASY to only be a "cyber" shoulder on which to cry.
Mathias will be fine. Actually, I think a vast majority of his ego is already okay. Birmingham Royal finished their tour to Sunderland and is now in London. Mathias has lots of new friends and a wonderful future ahead. In the long run, this will just be a disappointment. I think he really would have waited for her forever. Now, he can find someone who will feel the same way about him. He does live in the world of ballet afterall!
Day to day journal of installation, embroidery, and fiber arts created by Susan Lenz
4 comments:
Weäre sorrz too. Love to Mathias. Mom
How do you like the German keyboard?
I believe in first loves too. And seconds and thirds. I think there are many wonderful people in the world. I don't think, necessarily, there is only one person for each of us. Maybe there is one PERFECT person but that person is not always found. I believe that you can find love, satisfaction, contentment and passion with more than just one person on this earth. There are many people who are compatible with each of us. There are many people worthy of the love in one's heart. And I believe love is worth the risk of hurt and sadness. Because the happiness and wonders can be so great. Many people come in and out of my life. People I love in many different ways and for many different reasons. I try to learn from each of them. I try to give. Not necessarily "give back" but just "give". I don't regret. I do try to look for the good in everyone. And always remember, everything you experience, everything that happens in your life, every person you touch and every person that touches you, everything in your life makes you who you are. There is no one on this earth like you.
I am sad for your son. I hope he'll make it ok.
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